Russell's Old Journal

[Russell]

Mar 6 2012, 9:14 AM EST

So weird. This post-path stuff is confusing. Had 2 sits yesterday both felt like I was in Equanimity the whole time sans any vibration type stuff at the 3rd eye. Lots of gentle vibrations in the hand, like where they feel like they disappear and the sits were very calming and equanimous. No idea if I am still reviewing on moved on and its progressing rapidly.

[Russell]

Mar 7 2012, 10:26 AM EST

2 sits again yesterday, both felt like I ramped up to EQ again, pressure at 3rd eye area, hands vibrating, almost disappearing. Super spacious and accepting. However, towards the end of the last sit I got trapped in some thoughts, then felt like I shifted to Re-observation a little bit with random itches all over the place. So the question of the day is, is my cutting edge EQ of 2nd path or am I still in Review Phase B. Who knows?

Edit: Forgot to mention daily headaches. Not sure if they have to do with meditation or not.

[Russell]

Mar 8 2012, 9:17 AM EST

Really starting to think I am shifting from Low EQ to High EQ now. These sits remind me exactly what it was like when I was in EQ during 1st path. It feels really nice to get into that groove and just sit in deep concentration with things buzzing about. A little more 2nd gear style watching started happening on its own last night as well. Still having headaches.

[Russell]

Mar 9 2012, 9:46 AM EST

Hands tingling minutes after I sit. Very strong pressure and tingling in 3rd eye area. More of the same, boring and wonderful at the same time.

[Russell]

Mar 10 2012, 11:16 AM EST

Had a very late night sit after a long, tiring day. Had lots of distracting thoughts but still got very relaxed and equanimous, however, no major vibrations in the 3rd eye. This all feels very familiar to the few weeks leading up to SE.

Edit: forgot to mention I had bouts of major vertigo/dizziness early in the sit. Had not had that in a long time. Very odd. Had to open my eyes a couple times to make sure I wasn't really spinning.

[Russell]

Mar 11 2012, 10:35 AM EDT

50 min yesterday. Headaches continue on and off. Heavy head feeling. Lots of thoughts distracting me while i sit, I remember this happing later in 1st path as well. I have to do that "What will my next thought be?" trick. Seems to help. Mass tingling, strobing. Need to sit even more I feel like, but motivation still isn't has high as it was during the last round through this.

[Russell]

Mar 12 2012, 9:14 AM EDT

I feel like I am repeating myself at this point, still feels like EQ, but thoughts are really sneaking up on me. So when the thoughts start coming in full force during EQ I try to really pay attention and catch what is going on. Had some good insights into thoughts as suffering. Similar to the insights I had before 1st path, but those were more thoughts as not mine insights it seemed. This was a combo, I was realizing, once again that thoughts were just happening on their own, "I" was not generating them but this time I also realized that all they do is cause suffering.

[Russell]

Mar 13 2012, 10:15 AM EDT

Did not get to sit much yesterday, but I did get to have dinner with Vince Horn last night as he is in town for SXSW Festival. That was really cool to meet another geek like me, but I feel like such a newbie in all of this. Anyways, if it wasn't for Vince and buddistgeeks I would have never found this place, so I thank him immensly for that.

Replies:

DonLoristo
Mar 13 2012, 10:28 AM EDT

Hey Russell I like to remind myself that everyone starts off as a newbie. Just think one day you will be able to help a newbie out with all of the experience you gained on the path. Yeah I love Buddhist Geeks and if I hadn't heard Vince's interview with Daniel Ingram I would have never learned about Pragmatic / Hardcore Dharma so much props to Vince and Buddhist Geeks!

andymr
Mar 13 2012, 10:43 AM EDT

Chalk up another one for those early Daniel Ingram interviews! I went from Gil Frondsahl to Daniel Ingram and wow! what a culture shock. It seems like quite a coincidence to me that I managed to pick a Daniel Ingram interview as the first BG podcast I heard.

DonLoristo
Mar 13 2012, 10:59 AM EDT

Here's to "getting it done"!

[Russell]

Mar 13 2012, 11:14 AM EDT

Yeah it's crazy. A year ago I found myself reading Tibetan Buddhist books and not understanding that you can really get this stuff done, then several months later finding MCTB through Buddist Geeks, then finding this site and Ron, getting stream entry and then actually sitting down with Vince at dinner. All in less than a year. Full circle. Very cool.

Reply:

DonLoristo
Mar 13 2012, 1:04 PM EDT

"Yeah it's crazy. A year ago I found myself reading Tibetan Buddhist books and not understanding that you can really get this stuff done, then several months later finding MCTB through Buddist Geeks, then finding this site and Ron, getting stream entry and then actually sitting down with Vince at dinner. All in less than a year. Full circle. Very cool."
Awesome. Reading this I felt mudita arise in me.

[Russell]

Mar 14 2012, 9:26 AM EDT

Last nights sit felt really good, didn't want to get up but life came calling. Got to where everything was vibrations after some fighting with thoughts. Got some very interesting rising absorbtions like 4th jhana when I focused on the tingling of my temples around the crown of my head. almost felt like most of my body dissapeared. Can still feel some of the pressure and tingling in the temple area today.